REDUCE STRESS
TABLE OF
CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION
WHAT IS STRESS?
HOW TO CONTROL STRESS
SELF HYPNOSIS
OTHER STRESS REDUCERS
TAKE A STRESS TEST
CONFIDENCE AND SELF ESTEEM
FINAL
THOUGHTS
THE
LITTLE TEST
INTRODUCTION
Did you know that 90% of
doctor visits are for stress related symptoms?
Stress bombards us every
day from all directions. Maybe it’s
sitting in the midst of highway gridlock when you are already late for an
important appointment. Or how about the
bill you forgot to pay? It could be a
phone call from the school complaining about your child’s behavior.
These are just the
annoying little stress triggers that we handle every day. What about the larger issues? Retirement, moving, divorce or, heaven
forbid, the death of a loved one or friend can come out of the blue and here
comes the stress launching you into treading murky waters one more time.
The impression is that the
feelings of stress come from outside sources when, in reality, it happens
inside of us.
When we feel as though we
are under pressure, our bodies react the same way that we have trained them to
do with a rise in blood pressure, tightening of muscles and accelerated
breathing.
These physical symptoms
are generally referred to as “fight or flight” responses. This is a term leftover from historical times
when the choices were to flee or stand and fight.
Unfortunately, today we
don’t have those options. Each situation
must be dealt with and that’s where the stress comes in. Some stress is unavoidable and is actually
good for you as we will discuss further on.
But too much stress leads to troubles that can range from upset stomach
to anxiety attacks and even as serious as heart attacks.
There’s a whole arsenal of
stress busting tools available that we will discuss here. Hopefully, the more you understand your
stress, the better prepared you are at controlling your body’s response to
stress and restoration to a calmer state of mind.
WHAT IS
STRESS?
Chemically, stress is a
condition that your body enters as the result of a message received from your
brain telling it to prepare to run or fight.
The body reacts by preparing for that eventuality. The brain tells the adrenal glands to send a
rush of two hormones (adrenaline and noradrenaline) to the muscles in
preparation for them to respond to a fear or a threat.
It is the job of the brain
to protect the body. It accomplishes
this by telling the noradrenaline to redirect blood flow from lower priority
areas of your body (like skin or your abdomen) to the muscles to give you a
“power boost.”
At the same time the brain
is also telling the adrenaline to speed up your breathing to take in more
oxygen to feed the work being done on the muscles with the noradrenaline.
Unfortunately, when you
can’t make a decision about how to react (fight or flight), these two hormones
are caught in limbo rushing around madly waiting for you to decide what you
want them to do. Since you aren’t doing
that, the only choice they have is to cause vomiting, make you tremble, panic
or maybe even pass out.
It’s actually a very
efficient process and has worked wonderfully for thousands of years. When we were running across the plains
barefoot with a spear in our hand bearing down on supper, we needed this
process to protect us. Indeed, the
entire system is just the result of the brain doing what it is supposed to do.
. .keep the body functioning and protect it.
We no longer chase the
wooly mammoth nor does our survival revolve around running away from a rival
tribe (well maybe just a little). The
battles today are demanding employers, uncontrollable traffic, annoying neighbors,
partners, children and oh yes, taxes!
Here’s where the
interesting part of this analysis comes in.
Even though our situation has changed, the chemicals are still there
along with the vehicle to drive them.
The system is very
efficient and works quite effectively.
This is why you have stress. It
is merely a response to a perceived threat and the brain will set it in motion
on a subconscious level even at the slightest sensation of danger. In fact it will DEMAND this action.
Since we now live in an
“enlightened” society, we are conditioned not to throw a spear at the boss,
strangle your spouse or set the neighbor’s house afire.
What is needed is the
ability to change our programmed responses.
We need to discern the difference between real threats and our own
internalized perceptions of danger.
Sounds pretty simple, huh?
Sure it does. Until you’re sitting in that freeway
gridlock, half an hour late for the most important career busting appointment
of your life, knowing full well that your blankety blank boss will turn the
account over to that jerk in the office and you’ll never get the raise you were
counting on when your son starts college in the fall. . . .whew!
Here come the chemical
twins, adrenaline and noradrenaline ready to do battle with no battle to go
to. They’re rushing through your body
and have got to attack something. Your
muscles aren’t responding by running or fighting so they’ll just pick any old
organ to attack instead. A good one is
the heart.
Sometimes a dose of the
chemical twins is a good thing. After
all, even though we are now “civilized” there are still very real threats in
the world. Just take a look at the
evening news or read about the latest “mugging” in the newspaper.
So, here is the
paradox. You need the chemical twins to
protect you from real danger but you don’t need them to cause illness,
unhappiness and stress. The challenge is
knowing when to have them and you don’t need them.
Logically you know that
you don’t need them under most normal situations like: at work, at a party or
when the kids are screaming in your ear.
So what can you do? Some people turn to drugs or alcohol and
others take out their frustration on the people they care about the most. You can learn how to control the twins. Let’s
do that now.
HOW TO CONTROL STRESS
What’s causing your
stress?
A slow buildup of everyday
annoyances: a dead car battery, traffic jam, buttons that pop off your clothes
as you are going to an important meeting.
It’s the little things that get under your skin
Is it a tight schedule and
seemingly insurmountable problems? Bills
to pay, a boss to please, a colicky baby to pacify? Juggling many roles is a main cause of
stress.
Maybe it’s positive and
negative life changes, from the joy of a wedding to the loss of a spouse; from
the exhilaration of a job promotion to sadness at moving away from old friends.
Perhaps the cause of your
stress is inner conflict. Anger with
your boss actually may be old anger against a parent bubbling to the
surface. If you can recognize a pattern
from the past, this can be an instant stress reliever. Take some time, even just 30 seconds and
write down your feelings.
What you need to do is relax. Huh?
It can’t be that simple! Yes, it
can and you can do it. No, we can’t
control other people and situations.
What you can do is control how you respond to people and events.
What you have done is
given away control to others. What you
need to do is regain that control seal it up and only let the twins out when
it’s really necessary.
When was the last time you
actually relaxed? Can you remember what
it was like? Were you calm and
collected? Was your breathing
normal? Were your muscles loose? And, did you feel that way without any
outside stimulants like drugs? If so,
the good news is that you can restore that same feeling at will. Yes, you can definitely take it back whenever
or wherever you choose.
When your mind is
bypassing the chemical twins and sending truly relaxing messages to your body,
wonderful things begin to happen. Just
as the chemical twins jump to attention when you stress, other chemicals go to
work when you relax causing you to have a feeling of contentment.
While relaxing, actions
taken by people and external events are still important but not necessarily
personal. You are able to discern that
no one is launching a direct attack upon you or anyone or anything of
yours.
Small problems remain
small problems and not the wooly mammoth charging down upon you. Large events will become smaller and not
cause you to get out of your car during gridlock and shout obscenities to the
drivers in front of you.
Those people who are
horrible and annoying, shrink to a caricature serving up no more significance
in your world than an ant on a picnic table.
As you continue your journey toward relaxation, you can watch these
people with amusement. When you reach
the point of total relaxation you are able to see your world as it is, not for
how you feel about it.
Everything you do is a
matter of choice. You choose to be
angry, happy or indifferent. You make a
conscious choice to take action or not to take action.
On the opposite end of the
spectrum are the chemical twins controlling what you know is stress and you are
bumped, pushed and thrown into chaos. No
choice and no idea why you don’t have a choice.
Obviously, relaxing is a
good thing because it gives you choice.
It puts you back in the drivers seat instead of the chemical twins.
So relax already! Sure, just like that.
Do you remember tormenting
your neighbors cat as a child? You had
the upper hand until kitty fought back.
You’d step away from the torment and probably forget all about it until
the next time you scratched. It took a
few lessons, but pretty soon you understood if you tormented the cat, the cat
would fight back. That was a conscious
action taken to prevent being hurt. It
was a survival strategy just like fight or flight, except that this was behavior
modification instead of an automatic response.
As you grew older the
behavior for survival changed but the bottom line is that you probably used a
dozen behaviors without even thinking about it every day of the week. The one behavior that you probably overlooked
is the most important one of all, the behavior to relax.
If relaxation is just
another behavior that means it’s a learned response. And, if that is the case you be able to
change the behavior. Chances are you
were never taught how to do that which is why you are reading this in the first
place.
You have to teach your
brain how to do it. Actually, your brain
already knows how subconsciously, but you need to teach it how to do it
consciously. In order to do that, you
need an understanding of how your mind works.
Everything you have ever
encountered or done in your entire lifetime is permanently recorded in your
subconscious mind. Most of it is not remembered consciously. If I ask you, “How much is two and two,” you
will immediately answer, “four.” That
was from your conscious memory. But if I
ask you what you had for dinner ten years ago tonight, it will more than like
be impossible for you to consciously remember it at all. However, your subconscious remembers it in
great detail.
When you drive your car,
you are probably thinking about all kinds of things other than driving the
car. Your subconscious, through habit,
was controlling all your driving actions.
You just automatically arrive at your destination without giving it
detailed conscious thought.
You didn’t have to think
“push the brake” or “ease up on the gas pedal.”
You did it all automatically controlled by your subconscious. Your subconscious is designed to protect
you. It controls all body
functions. If you are cold in the night,
it awakens you. If you need to go to the
bathroom, it awakens you also. If you
burn your hand, it will raise a blister to protect you. It controls your heartbeat and all other
involuntary functions of the body.
Your subconscious doesn’t
rationalize, it doesn’t ask questions, doesn’t know truth from falsehood. It merely acts upon whatever information is
stored within.
There are actually four
states of consciousness, but for our purposes we will be dealing with just two:
Beta – this is our waking
state
Alpha – first step to the
subconscious
The Alpha state is where
we will begin our work. This is the
state where you are relaxed, the normal machinations of your conscious mind are
just a little distant and you feel warm and comfortable. The chemical twins are sealed up where they
belong
Have you ever sat in a car
waiting for a friend or family member to run in and make a quick purchase or
run an errand? It may be a warm, sunny,
spring day. The window is open and you
can feel a gentle breeze caress your cheek and fluff your hair. The sun feels warm and cozy on your
face. Before you know it, your eyelids
begin to droop as you sit and enjoy a moment of oneness with your
surroundings. Not awake and not asleep
you are totally relaxed and content to drift along quietly enjoying the
sensation of the warm sun and the gentle breeze.
If you have ever had this
or a similar experience, you were in that Alpha state. Close your eyes and see if you can recapture
the same sensations you had while you were in that state. Take a few moments to do that then imagine a
car door slamming and pulling your instantaneously back in to the Beta
state. Wow! What a rude awakening.
This level is where you
can do the best work for yourself on a subconscious level. This is also a state of meditation, and the
level you work with using self-hypnosis.
The truth is that you are
actually in this state every single day at least two times. Those times are the fleeting moments just
before you drift off to sleep and just as you awaken.
Your conscious mind has
the ability to reason out a course of action that would be helpful to you. However, the conscious mind needs the
cooperation of the subconscious and will send its energy out to implement the
decision.
Your energy source is the
subconscious mind. No matter what you
consciously do to instruct the subconscious mind to do something thee is no way
to permanently override what the subconscious mind has been programmed to do.
Let’s take a look at some
examples. If a very young child is told
by a parent, teacher, elder sibling or anyone else in a position of authority:
“You never do anything
right.”
“What’s the matter with
you?”
“Why can’t you be more
like Billy?”
“Don’t you have a brain in
your head.”
“Why are you so stupid?”
“You will never amount to
anything!”
This child will often be a
failure in life. The reason is that this
child’s conscious mind is not developed enough to block this type of
information. Therefore, it becomes a
fact in his subconscious mind.
As he/she grow to
adulthood, his subconscious will be a very good student and apply everything it
has learned. Remember, the subconscious
is not right or wrong, good or bad, it is merely a computer just like the one
you are reading from now.
His subconscious will force the conscious to
act in exactly the same manner that was programmed as a child.
The subconscious mind will
only accept what the conscious mind believes at the time the suggestion is
offered. However, if the conscious mind
changes an opinion on a given matter after it has become embedded in the
subconscious the subconscious will not change with it.
These factors are
important to understand before you begin your work. There are certain “tapes” in your
subconscious mind that will not be changed.
What you can do is create “new” responses.
SELF HYPNOSIS
Now that you have a very
basic understanding of how the conscious and subconscious mind work, your first
step is to learn how to put your mind in this state yourself in order to
facilitate the changes that need to be made.
Since self-hypnosis is simple to learn we will begin with that modality
and give you several examples that you can use for self-hypnosis.
The first thing you need
to do is learn how to hypnotize yourself.
There are three tools that you will be using: suggestion, concentration
and imagination. If you have a good
imagination you will have no trouble mastering these techniques very quickly.
It is important not to try
too hard. The whole concept is to just
relax and let yourself go. If you try
too hard you will become tense and this is exactly what you don’t want.
Also ignore any analytical
attitude. If you don’t, you will keep
the conscious mind awake and the whole object of hypnotizing yourself is to
relax.
We assume you want to
hypnotize yourself or wouldn’t be doing this.
You can’t go into self-hypnosis against your will. Therefore you can’t do it unless you follow
the rules.
Before we begin, it is
important to realize that there is no set “script” to the verbiage of a
hypnotic trance. There are different
techniques used by pioneers in hypnotherapy.
The first technique was developed by one of those pioneers. His name was Charles Tebbetts who was already
a teenager by World War I. Charles is
known for his comment that, “all hypnosis is self-hypnosis, and the power is in
the mind of the person being hypnotized.”
Our first technique is
called “Fractional Relaxation,” and is
one of the best induction methods for beginners. It takes a little longer than some other
formulas, but it’s a great conditioning technique for faster methods which can
be more easily learned later. It relaxes
the body completely, often to the point of partial or total loss of bodily
awareness. Tension is released and the
conscious mind drifts I and out of awareness of the surroundings, often viewing
mental images of forgotten events from the subconscious. Here’s how you do it:
BEGIN INDUCTION
Lie down on your back,
arms parallel to your body, fingers loosely outstretched and palms
downward. Separate the feet by eight or
ten inches so that no part of your thighs are touching. Use a pillow if you wish, and make yourself
as comfortable as possible. Remove or
loosen clothing that binds you in any way and remove your shoes if they are tight. The idea is to get comfortable and relaxed.
If you are recording this
procedure, use the second person throughout, but if you intend to use it
without a recording, memorize it in the first person. It is given here in the second person so it
may be read directly fro the book into the microphone. Start reading in a soft voice, rather slowly,
and gradually slow down more and more, drawing out your words and pausing often
between sentences. Your voice and the
pace of your speech must suggest drowsiness and relaxation. Speak in a very slow monotone.
Now let’s assume you are
in the described position, and are listening to your voice coming from your
recorder. He is what you should hear:
“Fix your eyes on a spot
on the ceiling and take three long, deep breaths. Inhale, hold the air in your lungs for three seconds, and as you exhale
slowly, you will relax all over. Now
let’s take the first breath. Inhale.
(pause) Exhale – Sleep now (pause) Now another deep breath, even deeper than
before. Inhale. (pause) Exhale – Sleep now. (pause) Now another deep breath,
even deeper than before. Inhale. (pause)
Exhale – Sleep now. (pause) Now as your
whole body begins to relax, and as every muscle and nerve begins to grow loose
and limp – your eyelids also become heavy and tired. They grow heavier and heavier, and will close
now. The lids have become so tired and
so heavy, it would be difficult to open them, but have no desire to try because
you want them to remain closed until I tell you to open them. (pause)
Now I want you to
concentrate all of your attention on your right foot. Relax the toes of your right foot. Imagine they are like loose rubber bands
dangling from your foot. (pause) Let
this loose feeling spread back through the ball of the foot, and then all the
way back to the heel. (pause) (Drag out the word all and speak very slowly
fro this point on, pausing between ALL sentences.)
Now let this relaxed
feeling go up into the calf of the leg.
Let the calf muscles go loose-and-limp and LA-A-A-ZY. (long pause)
And now, while your muscles and nerves are relaxing, let your mind relax
also. Let it drift away to pleasant
scenes in your imagination. Let your
mind wander where it will, as you go deeper – deeper into drowsy relaxation. You are breathing easily; all of your cares
and tensions are fading away, as you go deeper – d-e-e-p-e-r into drowsy
slumber. Every breath that you take –
every noise that you hear makes you go deeper, deeper, into pleasant,
comfortable relaxation.
Now let the wonderful wave
of relaxation move from your right calf up into the large thigh muscles. Let them go loose and limp. The right leg is now completely relaxed and
comfortable. (pause) Now the left
foot. The toes relax, the whole foot
relaxes just as the right one did – limp and lazy. Let the feeling of pleasant relaxation go up
into the left calf. Let the calf muscles
go. Your legs are feeling heavy like
pieces of wood. As you relax the left
thigh muscles, they feel heavier and heavier and you become more and more
drowsy. Now as the wave of relaxation
moves upward through your hips and abdomen, you let go more and more. Think of your abdomen as an inflated
ball. Your are letting the air out of
the ball and it spreads out and relaxes completely. Stomach and solar plexus relax. Let them go – as you go further into deep –
deep slumber. (pause)
(slowly) The fingers in your right hand are now
relaxing and so is your wrist. Now your
forearm relaxes. On up to your right
shoulder – your whole right arm is relaxed and numb. You probably feel your fingers or your toes
tingling. This is a good sign, so
continue to go deeper. And now, just go
on over, into a deep, deep hypnotic sleep. (pause)
The fingers on your left
hand are completely relaxed. Your hand
and forearm are letting go. Up, through
your elbow, to your upper arm, relax.
Now the left shoulder, let go – loose, limp and lazy. Now relax all the large back muscles, from
your shoulders all the way down to your waist – let them all go limp and
loose. (Remember, plenty of pauses. Continue to speak softly and very slowly.)
Relax the muscles in your
neck. Let your jaws separate and let
the chin and cheek muscles go loose and
rubbery. (pause) Now let your eyes go. Let them go completely – relax and feel
comfortable and good. Relax the eyebrows
too and the forehead. Let the muscles
rest. Back across the scalp – let the
entire scalp relax – from the forehead all the way back to the back of the neck
– all relaxed – all resting – all loose.
You are now completely relaxed.
Your body feels boneless. You are
going deeper and deeper into restful hypnosis.
Your mind is experiencing a wonderful feeling of tranquility. Your subconscious is now receptive to the
helpful suggestions I am now going to give it.
(At this point the suggestion is given to the subconscious mind.)”
END INDUCTION
What we are using in this
next example is a variation of the Fractional Relaxation Technique called the
“Rapid Induction Technique.”
BEGIN INDUCTION
1. Make yourself as comfortable as you can on
a mat, a couch or a chair.
2. Inhale deeply and exhale, releasing all muscular tensions
everywhere in the body. Continue to
breathe naturally, easily and gently.
3. Close your eyes. Focus
your attention gently on your subconscious mind and give it the following
commands silently and in sequence:
a. Address yourself by name. (The name or nickname to which you usually
respond to automatically when called by another person. Say silently to your subconscious mind, “I
WANT YOU TO RELAX, VERY DEEPLY, NOW!”
b. Let go and let down. Feel
your mind, your emotions and your physical body sink quickly and deeply into
relaxation, drifting ever deeper and deeper until you reach a plateau of
relaxation.
c. At this point, again address your subconscious mind by name and
once more say silently to yourself, “I WANT YOU TO RELAX MORE DEEPELY, NOW!”
d. Feel yourself plunging deeper into relaxation, going down
further and deeper until you reach another plateau of relaxation.
e. Once again, address your subconscious mind quietly, silently, by
name and repeat the command, “I WANT YOU TO RELAX MORE DEEPLY NOW!”
f. And finally, once more, address yourself in a silent whisper,
calling yourself by name and giving yourself a final command, “I WANT YOU TO
RELAX MORE DEEPLY NOW!”
g. At this time you should reach a very effective level of deep
relaxation when you can give yourself very effective suggestions toward
achieving your desired goals.
h. You may give yourself suggestions in the form of visualizations,
positive verbal suggestions, altered feelings or emotions such as:
1) Visualizing
your ideal configuration and weight.
2) Replacing any fears, anxieties, depressions or
other negative feelings by a sense of self confidence, optimism, pride or other
positive emotion through verbal suggestions and suggested feelings.
3) Permitting a feeling of deep pervasive peace to
envelop you.
4) Suggesting to your subconscious mind – time
contractions – for example, that the next hour will seem like only ten minutes
have passed.
5) Any other
suggestions consistent with your selected goals.
4. With daily practice for about
two weeks, using this Rapid Self Induction Technique, you should be able to put
yourself into an effective level of deep relaxation, within 30 seconds whether
lying down, sitting or standing up.
5. After you have mastered the Rapid Self
Induction Technique, with an additional 1 to 3 weeks of daily practice to
achieve a state of deep, effective relaxation within 1 to 5 seconds merely by
closing your eyes and silently saying to yourself, “RELAX.” This almost instant self induction should be
practiced consistently in all positions (lying, sitting and standing) to
maintain proficiency.
END INDUCTION
Now that you have learned
how to induce an advanced state of relaxation, you must learn how to structure the
suggestion you would like to teach to your subconscious mind.
The subconscious mind must
obey suggestions as though they were orders.
While in hypnosis, with the conscious mind somewhat inhibited, it is
possible to reach the subconscious mind directly with the suggestions that you
want it to program.
It is very important to
understand that the subconscious operates without the benefit of your conscious
reasoning. Therefore you must be
extremely careful with wording your suggestions. Structure them correctly and the subconscious
will carry them out for you faithfully without conscious effort of any
sort. Your motivation must be
strong.
Start your suggestion with
your motivating desire:
“Because I have a strong
desire to live stress free, highway gridlock no longer upsets me”
“Because I have a strong
desire to have an attractive, slim figure and because I enjoy wearing a size
nine dress my body no longer requires more calories than it needs to live
healthy”
There are examples of two
complete auto suggestions. A couple of
factors are important. You must always
phrase the suggestion in the present tense as if the action has already
occurred. You must never mention the
negative behavior you wish to eliminate.
Suggest action not the
ability to act. In other words, don’t
say, I have the ability to live stress free. . . .and so on. You must be specific.
Use repetition when
writing your suggestion. Repeat it,
enlarge upon it and repeat it again in different words. Embellish it with convincing adjectives. Repeat your suggestion daily until it becomes
entrenched in your subconscious.
OTHER STRESS REDUCERS
Research has shown that
the stress hormone cortisol reduces a person’s ability to retrieve information
and memory. Even worse, this same stress
hormone is linked to progressive shrinking of the hippocampus – an important
memory center in the temporal region.
High levels of stress also promote depression, which severely impairs
memory and increases the risk for dementia.
To reduce stress, try relaxation
exercises. Sit quietly and breathe
deeply and slowly. Relax each part of
your body, starting with the top of your head and finishing with your toes.
Look for humor in tense
situations and talk about your feelings with family members, friends or a
therapist, if necessary.
Try reducing stress and
anxiety with fresh, natural scents. In
general they induce a calming state. In
one recent study, volunteers became extremely anxious when they were confined
in coffin-like tubes, but then calmed down when the tubes were infused with the
smells of green apple and cucumber.
These odors seem to have an impact on the limbic systems, the emotional
center of the brain.
If you anticipate a
situation where you will feel anxious, try a shampoo with green-apple flavored
shampoo Here are a few tips that will
lower stress in five minutes or less:
· Move around.
· Walk rapidly around your workplace.
· Take a quick walk around the block.
· Climbing rapidly up and down a flight of stairs
really gets the heart pumping.
· Try 15 jumping jacks in place.
· Stretch while seated at your desk. Link your fingers under a knee and draw it to
your chest. Repeat with your other
knee. This stretches the legs and the
lower back.
· Stretch your arms above your head, palms up and
fingers linked. Dangle hands at your
sides, then raise right shoulder to right ear, keeping the head vertical. Repeat this with the left shoulder. Finally, flex and bend back the fingers of
each hand. This is especially important
if you use a computer for long periods.
· Take 10 long deep breaths. Your belly should expand as you inhale and
contract as you exhale.
· Try massaging your eyes by placing the palms over
them and while spiraling your palms apply gentle pressure. Try the same technique for your ears. Periodically, try to block out all sight and
sound for just a second or two.
Researchers report that this can be a refreshing experience from a
psychological standpoint.
· Experiment with aromatherapy. A drop of citrus essential oil like
lemon-lime or orange is refreshing for your office or home and is not
overbearing.
· Early morning sleep is really the most restful
sleep you can get. Men sent to bed at
2:15 a.m. and awakened at 6:15 a.m. slept more soundly than ones sent to bed at
10:30 and awakened at 2:30 a.m. So, if
you are stressed and can get only four hours of sleep, stay up as late as
possible to get the most benefit from your limited sleep. This does not replace a full night’s
sleep. Resume normal sleep pattern as
quickly as possible.
Meditation is a favorite
stress buster for some people. Getting
away from the everyday hassles of the world and turning your thoughts inward is
a great stress buster. Meditation helps
you see the objectivity in your own life and thoughts in a detached
manner. Meditation is proven to reduce
anxiety, work related stress. . .and blood pressure, too.
There are many meditation
techniques, but here is common one that is simple:
· Sit quietly and comfortably in a place where you
will not be disturbed.
· Focus your attention on your breathing.
· Feel the breath as it comes into your nose. .
.and when it goes out.
· Other thoughts will enter your mind. Just observe them and let them go. Return your attention to your breath.
Start practicing
meditation for five to 10 minutes a day, gradually increasing it to 20 to 30
minutes. Keep a clock nearby so you can
keep track of the time but don’t use an alarm that might be jerk you back to
full alertness too quickly.
Regular moderate exercise
reverses much of the damage caused by stress and can also improve immune system
function, lower blood pressure and improve your mood. The reason is because any physical activity
negates the fight-or-flight response and can leave you feeling less tense,
anxiety free and invigorated.
Aerobic exercise is an
effective stress buster but you may be more suited to relaxed walking.
Any exercise that suits
you is fine just be sure and do it for at least 20 minutes each day. Don’t overdo it, however, because more is not
necessarily good for you.
Human beings have an
inborn affinity for nature. There is a
scientific name for it “biophilia.” What
that means is that we enjoy things having to do with nature and having
“natural” things around us is psychologically beneficial. For example:
· Having an office with a view is not just
prestigious. Studies have shows that
workers who have a view of grass and trees exhibit less stress than who look at
parking lots.
· Dentists who have an aquarium in their waiting
room report that their patients are less anxious.
· Eating lunch on a park bench will relax your
body.
· To reduce stress try spending time in the garden
and your troubles will seem unimportant.
· Living in the city has its own stress
factors. When it comes to a vacation,
try planning it in a total different environment like the mountains or seaside.
· Research studies show that people who have pets
are generally healthier and have better methods of coping with stress. Consider
obtaining a cat, dog or even a bird.
Humor is a great stress
buster. Keeping a sense of humor and
learning not to take yourself so seriously definitely helps. It’s hard to remain stressed when you are
laughing at yourself. Try looking for the lighter side of every situation. Indulge your taste for entertaining books and
movies.
If you have a favorite
cartoon or saying, cut it out and put it on your bathroom mirror or
refrigerator.
Try silly antics. Things that you would normally not even
consider like walking in the rain or feeding birds in the park.
Cultivate
friendships. Having close ties with
others can make you feel warm inside.
Having someone to talk to about your problems with makes them much
easier to deal with.
Just having a friend helps
reduce your blood pressure and research has shown that those who have lots of
friends tend to have a lower level of cholesterol and strong immune systems.
Following a high carb, low
protein diet can help with reducing stress for a short period of time, but
should not be undertaken on a long term basis as the carbs represent just a
short term energy boost.
Other foods that fight
stress are foods that are rich in vitamins C and A like raw carrots peppers and
broccoli. There’s a bonus as well,
chewing crunchy foods helps to dissipate the tension.
How about some natural
therapies for stress? Here are a few:
· Lavendar - Use the flowers. This is a beautiful herb and is widely
used. Many do not realize that it is an
effective treatment for headaches related to stress. Also good for depression.
· St. Johns Wort - Taken
internally, has a sedative and pain reducing effect. Use in treatment of neuralgia, anxiety,
tension and similar problems.
· Vervain - Also known as Wild
Hyssop. Will strengthen the nervous
system while easing depression and melancholia.
Good for fever and best for colds, and for menopausal irritations.
Here are more tips to
consider for reducing stress:
· This one is a “no-brainer” and we won’t go into
detail here, but if you are a smoker – STOP!
· Try to avoid tight deadlines, keep your schedule looser.
· Ask for help instead of insisting on doing it all
yourself.
TAKE A
STRESS TEST
The standard tests that doctors use to tell
whether you are an easily stressed “hot reactor” (and at greater risk for
disease) are pretty simple, so take your pick, says Frank Barry, M.D., a family
practice physician in Colorado Springs and author of Make the Change for a
Healthy Heart. For the first two tests,
you’ll want to take a blood-pressure reading twice – once before the test and
once during the test – for comparison.
Test 1: Chill out.
In Test 1, put your and into a bucket of cold water for one minute and
have someone measure your blood pressure right after you have done it. If it goes up into the high range in response
to physical stress, you are a “hot reactor.”
Test 2: Do some math.
Test 2 is a little more cerebral.
Start with the number 100 and mentally subtract 7, then continue to
subtract 7 until you get to 2. In the
midst of your figuring, have your blood pressure taken. “There’s no exercise, no threat to your life,
but a lot of people still feel mental stress and their blood pressures soot
up,” says Dr. Barry.
Test 3: Talk to yourself. You can also test yourself without the shock
of cold water or the mental anguish of math.
As yourself: Are you working
toward your own true goals or someone else’s?
If you are busy trying to keep up
with the Joneses, “you’re still in the rat race, even if you have retired. You’re much more likely to feel the effects
of stress regardless of whether you’re a “hot reactor,” says Dr. Barry.
CONFIDENCE AND SELF ESTEEM
The greatest challenges to your confidence come
when you’re facing a situation that looks impossible. When this happens,
you must tap in to the unseen force of self-assurance so that you can press beyond
supposed limits. It’s not a matter of what things look like on the outside—the
key is to recognize what you have working on the inside.
Confidence is often the missing link to seeing
yourself accomplish the impossible. You just have to believe that you have what
it takes to be successful, and don’t back down from your capable stance.
You are in control of your thoughts. If you
choose to believe you have confidence - that you’re energized - then you will
be. The next time you face a big challenge, take a deep breath and fill your
heart with the belief that you have unlimited energy running through your
veins. Build your confidence by reflecting on those things you’ve already
accomplished. If you did it once, you can certainly do it again.
Today, receive the confidence you deserve—and
you’ll find that you always had it within you.
Don’t confuse self-esteem with arrogance:
Arrogance is an over evaluation of your worth, while self-esteem is a healthy
opinion of yourself—it’s valuing yourself to the point that you don’t allow
other people or negative situations and circumstance to influence the way you
feel about yourself. Until you value yourself, you won’t value anything, and
other people won’t value you either. After all, your relationship with yourself
is the most important one you’ll ever have.
When you’re filled with self-doubt, give yourself
a little pep talk. Repeat
“[Your name], you are great! You are a unique
individual, a new kind of person the world has never known. You were born to do
well. You were born to succeed. You were born to bless the lives of others. You
were born to be great, and you have what it takes to be great. You are
enthusiastic, optimistic, and a change-embracer. You are a giver, rather than a
taker. You are organized. You are a hard worker. You are happy. You are a
master over yourself, you are a leader. You are a big thinker. As blessed as
you are with all these talents, there isn’t one thing in the world you can’t
do. You will never fail. [Your name], go out and make today an ‘attitude is
everything’ day!”
By making this profession every day, you’ll
experience an awesome self-esteem boost! Remember, you are priceless—your past
is history, and your future is now!
FINAL THOUGHTS
Let’s review some of what you have learned about
stress. Steel will snap from it and a
pressure cooker will blow its lid.
Stress, pressure, tension is a fact of everyday life for most of us.
Remember that it puts you at risk for heart
attack, stroke, insomnia, backache, headache, irritable bowel syndrome, sports
injuries and infertility.
Stress can trigger serious illness like Graves
disease and fibromyalgia. Stress even
makes us more susceptible to the common cold.
With your health at stake, using some of the
methods we have discussed is essential.
Also, it’s important that you remember that stress is a physiological
response. It isn’t all in your
head! You owe it to yourself to take the
time to use the stress-reducing techniques on a daily basis.
We’ve already given you a great selection, but we
want to make certain that you have a wide range of coping skills to use at
home, work and other places. So here are an additional 12 keys to stress
reduction to help you open the door to a more relaxing life. They contain dozens of additional helpful
hints. Choose those best suited for you.
Breathe deeply. Relax your muscles, expanding your stomach
and chest. Exhale slowly. Repeat several times.
Follow your breath as it
flows in and out. Do not try to control
it. This is a good way to relax in the
midst of any activity. This technique
allows you to find a breathing pattern that is natural and relaxing to you.
Use this yoga
technique: Inhale slowly, counting to
eight. Exhale through your mouth, even
more slowly, counting to sixteen. Make a
sighing sound as you exhale, and feel tension dissolve. Repeat 10 times.
Exercise regularly. Aerobic exercise, such as walking and
swimming, produces brain chemicals that uplift your mood and mental
well-being. Exercise also improves sleep
and gives you time to think and focus on other things. Beware of compulsive
exercise, however.
Yoga is an age-old system
for stretching and strengthening the muscles.
Take a class or learn at home with a good book or video.
Neck and shoulder
exercises are useful for the desk-bound and arthritis sufferers.
Neck roll: Look to the right, then roll your head
forward, as if you are trying to touch your chin to your chest. Keep rolling until you are looking over your
left shoulder. Repeat in the other
direction.
Shoulder lift: Relieve tension in the neck by lifting the
shoulders toward the ears, then dropping them as low as they will go. Repeat 10 times.
Eat healthy foods. You should never skip meals. Take time out for lunch no matter how busy
you are.
Carry nutritious snacks to
the office, or even the shopping mall. A
nutritionally balanced diet is important.
For example, researchers have found that even small deficiencies of
thiamin, a B-complex vitamin, can cause anxiety symptoms. Pantothenic acid, another B-complex vitamin,
is critical during times of stress.
Avoid caffeine, alcohol,
and large amounts of sweets, which can aggravate symptoms of stress.
Don’t let others get you
down. Choose positive friends whoa re not worriers. Friends who constantly put you down or talk
gloomily about life will increase your anxiety.
Ask a good friend to help
you talk out a problem and get it off your chest. A long-distance call to an old pal can be
great therapy.
Forgive others instead of
holding grudges. Relax your standards –
for yourself and others. Perfectionism
is not the way to happiness. Become more
flexible.
Communicate clearly with
your co-workers and boss. Ask
questions. Repeat instructions that you
are given. Clarifying directions at the
start of a project can save hours later straightening out misunderstandings.
Be truthful with
others. Lies and deception lead to
stress that always takes it toll.
Be optimistic. Count your blessings, especially when
everything seems to go wrong. Believe
that most people are doing the best that they can.
Don’t blow problems out of
proportion. Live by a philosophy of life
that whittles problems down to size. The
maxim, “Live one day at a time,” has helped millions.
Plan your time wisely. And realistically. For example, don’t schedule back-to-back
meetings with tight travel time.
Remember to leave room for unanticipated events – both negative and
positive. Be flexible about rearranging
your agenda.
Get up 15 minutes early in
the morning. Allow an extra 15 minutes
to get to all appointments.
Avoid
procrastination. Whatever needs doing,
do it now. Schedule unpleasant tasks
early, so that you won’t have to worry about them for the rest of the day.
Keep an appointment
book. Don’t rely on your memory.
Do one thing at a
time. Focus your attention on the person
talking to you or the job at hand, instead of worrying about other things. This also reduces mistakes-which lead to
more anxiety.
Be prepared to wait. Carry a book to read in case of delays.
Say “no” to requests that
stretch you to the limits.
Delegate. You don’t have to do it all yourself. Break a job into separate tasks and assign
them to people with the appropriate skills.
Then leave them alone to do their work.
Prevent problems before
they occur. This
takes some planning.
If you are flying to
another city for an important meeting, carry your presentation materials and
dress suit on board the plane. Baggage
does get lost.
Buy gas for the car before
the tank is empty. Get regular oil
changes and checkups.
Keep food staples on hand
so you can fix a fast meal without going to the store.
Keep food, toilet paper
and toiletries on hand so you never run out.
The same goes for postage stamps, paper and envelopes.
Keep duplicate keys for
home, car and office in secure locations.
Retreat to recharge your
spirit. Schedule private time every
day. You deserve it. Unplug the telephone and enjoy a quiet evening
alone or with your family, or even 15 uninterrupted minutes in the shower or
bathtub.
You may want to spend a
few minutes writing your feelings out in a journal. It can help you find a new perspective and
relieve hidden conflicts.
Here are more spirit rechargers:
Wear earplugs for instant
peace anytime, anyplace.
Learn a meditation
technique. Two methods: Observe your thoughts as they pass through
your mind. Or, repeat a word or phrase
with an uplifting meaning.
Practice progressive
relaxation for 20 minutes twice a day to relive high blood pressure and other
physiological responses to stress.
Tighten and release each muscle group in turn, starting with the soles
of the feet and slowly working up to the scalp.
Plan a weekend activity
that is a change of pace. If your week
is heavily scheduled, relax and enjoy noncompetitive activities. If you are never able to finish anything
during the week, choose a project that you can complete in a few hours on
Saturday or Sunday.
Take time out for a
diversion in the middle of your workday.
When the pressures of completing a project are too great, your
productivity can drop. Take a walk or
stop for lunch.
Savor life’s little
delights. Give yourself some physical
pleasure to help your stress slip away.
Treat yourself to a
professional massage, or trade massages with a loved one.
Give yourself permission
to enjoy a move, watch a sports event, listen to music or read a book.
Savor a soothing cup of
chamomile herb tea with a dollop of honey.
Chamomile has long been used to relieve nervous tension.
Plan a day of beauty with
a friend. Do each other’s hair, or paint
your nails and chat.
Create a simple steam
facial at home by boiling water. Remove
the pan from the stove. Cover your head with a large towel so that it creates a
tent over the pot. Steam your face for
five or 10 minutes. Add aromatic herbs
to the water for a sensual touch.
Focus completely on any of
the senses – hearing, seeing, eating or body movements – for a few
minutes. Even washing your hands can
become a sensual experience.
Use visualization and
affirmation techniques. You can
inoculate yourself against a situation you fear by going over the event in your
mind. Imagine the scene in vivid detail
and picture the best possible outcome.
You can also shrink an
imagined fear down to size by picturing the worst possible results. Imagine describing this worst case to your
best friend the next day and the sympathy you receive. Imagine telling a group of friends the next
month, who share their similar experiences.
Finally, imagine joking about your unpleasant experience with a complete
stranger a year later. If you carry this
exercise through to the end, your stress will become something to laugh about.
Replace negative self-talk
with affirmations. The chatterbox in
your mind is filled with gloom: You’re
too fat. . . you’re too old. . .you’ll never amount to anything. Like the little engine that could, nourish
your mind with a constant stream of “I know I can.”
Get enough sleep. Determine how much sleep you require for
optimum performance. Sleep deprivation
aggravates the body’s responses to stress.
Consider setting an alarm clock to remind yourself that it is time to go
to bed.
Strive for your dreams. Plan ahead to meet your most cherished goals
in life.
Time management experts
emphasize the importance of writing down your important goals.
Break big projects down
into a series of small steps that you can work on every day. Want to change jobs? Make on phone call contact today. Is writing a book your dream? Commit to writing one page a day.
Knowing that you are
striving toward your dreams relieves frustrations that mount when you feel
stuck in a rut of endless responsibilities that seem to lead nowhere.
Even if you only use these
last 12 keys to stress relief, you can become a happier, healthier person, a
more efficient worker and a better friend to others. Keep a notebook as new ideas come to you
through your reading and your own creativity.
The most important key is your decision to take time for yourself and to
simplify your life whenever possible.
THE LITTLE TEST
Alpha
SCORE
Below 20 - How long have you had this problem with telling the truth?
Below 40 - You are super cool but perhaps should try to introduce some
interest and excitement into your life. Get a hobby that you are passionate
about!
40 -50 You are as cool as a cucumber and should serve as a role model for
those around you.
51 -70 There are some issues you should address in your life but you have
normal stress levels and cope well with mild extra stress.
71 - 90 Your stress levels are slightly elevated. You can choose to
address them now or leave them to get worse.
91-110 Your stress levels are elevated beyond normal. You should attempt
to modify or alter the way you deal with stress or your health may suffer.
111-130 You are excessively stressed. You need to take action now to
modify or alter the way you cope with stress.
You may of course already know what your individual stressors are and
therefore know
the solution to your stress.
130+ You are super stressed and possibly heading for disaster. If you
have symptoms such as palpitations, shortness of breath, panic attacks,
fainting, excessive sweating, IBS, food intolerance or any known medical
condition you should see a medical practitioner to eliminate the possibility of
physical ailments or conditions.
Subject: How to
Reduce Stress at Work and at Home!
Burnout!
Everything your doctor didn’t
tell you about busting stress!
tell you about busting stress!
Seventy-hour
work weeks. Crazy commutes. Piles of unpaid bills. Endless family demands. Freeway gridlock. Soccer games.
Feel
like you want to just jump off the world and let it spin without your for
awhile? Life in the fast lane often
comes with a built-in speeding ticket. . .Burnout!
It’s a
state of mental and physical exhaustion that can lead to negative feelings
about your job, your life and yourself.
Reducing stress is key to dealing with burnout. Odds are pretty high that you’re a ticking
time bomb, ready to blow any minute.
Sadly,
we are creatures of habit and as such we begin to take the bad stuff for
granted as much as the good stuff. You
may not even realize that stress is taking a toll on you every day and if you
don’t get a handle on it, you are in big trouble.
We can
help. How to Reduce Stress at Work
and at Home is written just for you.
Not only do we help you understand what stress is all about, we give you
tons of “stress busters.”
Heck, a
little bit of stress is actually good for you.
But, when is it a problem? Take
our little test and see for yourself:
SCORING
Never -score -1
(minus 1)
Rarely -score 0
Occasionally
-score 1
Frequently -score
2
Always -score 3.
· If
you are doing something important do you miss meals?
· Do you feel like there aren’t
enough hours in the day?
· Do your days seem long and
boring?
· Ever have difficulty sleeping?
· Is it a struggle to go to work
each morning?
· Do you feel like everything
around you moves too fast?
· Do you feel like everything
around you moves too slow?
· When you relax do you think
about work or problems?
· When you relax do you feel
like you should be doing something?
· Do you feel like people take
advantage of you?
Did you know that
90% of doctor visits are for stress related symptoms? What is stress anyway? Do you know?
We’ll tell you on page 2.
· Do you find yourself finishing other peoples sentences?
· Are you usually rushing around like a headless chicken?
· When you’re
driving do other driver make you impatient?
· Do you feel
like something is missing in your life?
· Is it common
for you to lose your temper?
· Are you easily
depressed?
· Have you lost
your physical fitness?
· Do you get
frequent aches and pains in the neck and shoulders?
· Are you
drinking too much alcohol?
· Do you find
yourself becoming easily confused?
What you need to
do is relax. Huh? It can’t be that simple! Yes, it can and you can do it. We discuss that on page 7.
· Is it sometimes difficult to make decisions?
· Do you
bite your nails?
· Are you
suffering from frequent indigestion?
· Is it
difficult to make and keep friends?
· Do you
get angry frequently?
· Are you
finding that you are breathing fast?
· Do you
sometimes feel like you’d like to hit someone?
· Do you
sometimes feel unhappy even when your life is ok?
· Are
avoiding contact with people as much as possible?
· Do you
get blinding headaches for no apparent reason?
There are some
pretty powerful resources that you can put to work to help you combat
stress. You’ll probably be amazed at how
simple some of them are.
Just about
everyone has some stress in life even if they aren’t aware of it. Correcting it can be as simple as
understanding how the two parts of your mind work.
· Are your muscles frequently feeling tight and tense?
· Do you have
sexual problems that you never used to have?
· Are getting
coughs, colds and other minor infections?
· Do you have
dreams that you know will never come true?
· Are you
secretive?
· Do you wake up
from sleep and still feel tired?
· Are you putting
things off until the last possible moment?
We can’t control
other people and situations. What we can
do is control how we respond to people and events. The sooner you take back control of your
life, the happier you will be.
· Do you believe you are always right?
· Are you
gobbling your food?
· Do you dislike
many things?
· Are you not
enjoying your food?
· Is your memory
not working as well nowadays?
· Do you need to
be in control?
· Are you getting
hot or cold sweats out of the blue?
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